Hey, jerky ain’t cheap. Can’t blame a lady for wanting to ensure premium deliciosity before purchase.

A 50-year-old Grayslake woman is facing charges after police say she bit into several packages of beef jerky – through the plastic – and put the packages back on the shelf of a Dollar General store.
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(Sgt.) Heimos said a reason for the alleged jerky-biting is unknown.

(Photo: MRaichelson via Flickr)

We will give this reporter something. He is seriously up on his beef jerky crime. Hell, we didn’t even get around to posting about those guys who stole jerky to finance the remainder of their road trip!

The snack food scoundrel has hit six convenience stores in Cheektowaga alone, one of them twice, and there are reports of similar incidents in Amherst, Kenmore and Tonawanda.

Police said the suspect steals snack food, most of it beef jerky, and estimate his haul is worth an estimated $1,000 and growing.

01/27/11 Moreland Hills police reported at 2:40 a.m. Sunday that a “highly intoxicated male” was walking from the BP Station. When Chagrin Falls police caught up with him, “he appeared to have an entire package of beef jerky in his mouth,” and was reluctant to give his name and address. When police told him he needed to cooperate or face charges he said he was hungry and his mother was “Martha Washington.” The South Russell man, 24, was later picked up at the police station by his parents.  (Chagrin Falls, OH)

01/05/11 A caller reports that twice in the past 30 days he had found horse manure at 9A at Farragut Avenue, the place in which he normally parks his hot dog truck for operation. The caller stated that he’d had a dispute with an unknown individual several weeks prior to the first incident. The caller said the excrement was transported in black garbage bags with yellow plastic drawstrings, which were left at the scene. Police are still investigating. (Hastings-on-Hudson, NY)

Hey, a beef jerky addict’s gotta do what a beef jerky addict’s gotta do. Seriously, that shit’s expensive.

Man’s Two City Beef Jerky Crime Spree Comes to an End

Seems like Ronald Smith Jr. of Herkimer might have a thing for beef jerky, according to local police.
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As Smith faces similar charges in Rome and Yorkville, Collea said he is planning to review store surveillance videos to determine whether Smith will face any additional charges for stealing more beef jerky on other occasions.

Collea said he did not know why Smith might have been taking so much beef jerky.

The beef jerky, it will get you every time.

Escaped Sex Offender Nabbed After Beef Jerky and Beer Heist

A man who identified himself as Paul LeBlanc was caught stealing a case of beer and a beef jerky from a Lake City Walmart before 6 a.m. on Tuesday…

But once he was fingerprinted at the jail, police learned he was actually Kevin Robert LeBlanc, who had an outstanding warrant in New Hampshire, where he had escaped from a state prison…

When he disappeared, he had only 22 days left on his sentence before he was eligible for parole.

10/24/10 A man was arrested for shoplifting at Kroger on Ga. 20 after he was seen leaving the store without paying for several items. A loss prevention officer saw him stuffing a tenderloin steak, a ribeye steak, a bottle of A1 steak sauce and steak seasoning down his pants. (Newton, GA)

10/14/10 A BP Express attendant called police after seeing a suspicious man standing beside one of the gas pumps 11:16 p.m. Sunday.

When police arrived the Lorain man, 26, was holding a knife to his chest. He also had visible injuries from a fight earlier in the day in Sheffield.

He had numerous packages of beef jerky stuffed in his pants along with candy, potato chips, cheese and bean dip, causing one officer to remark he “had a party in his pants.”

The man stole $80 in food items from the gas station.

With him was a 16-year-old runaway boy from Lorain, who had also been involved in the earlier fight. The 26-year-old was transported to Geauga Hospital for observation. The boy’s mother was contacted to pick her son up at the police station. (Bainbridge, OH)

08/14/10 A can of beef jerky was stolen from the 30 block of 30th Street between 1:30 and 1:35 p.m. Thursday. (Newark, OH)

08/13/10 3:32 p.m.: Three teenage boys in a silver Volvo pulled up in the West Valley Mall parking lot in front of Barnes and Noble, 3150 Naglee Road, and proceed to put on disguises, including dark hoodies, glasses and fake mustaches. People reported further suspicious behavior by the teens, and police finally tracked them down. They said they were trying to sneak up on, and take photos of, a friend who just started working at Hot Dog on a Stick. (Tracy, CA)

08/01/10 Sparkman Drive: A pork butt, plums, bananas and two containers of Lunchables were among the items stolen from Walmart at 9:15 p.m. Friday. (Huntsville, AL)

07/18/10 Jeffrey Dean Gilliam, 53, of 700 W. Main St., has been charged with kidnapping and two counts of first-degree assault and battery. Gilliam is accused of entering a home on North Street and holding a knife on a woman, keeping her against her will, and forcing her to cook chicken legs for him at knifepoint, an incident report states. Gilliam told investigators he’d had “issues” since the recent death of his mother. (Spartanburg, SC)

07/17/10 A “possibly intoxicated” couple stole “beef jerky and laundry detergent” from a Lee Highway drug store. (Bristol, VA)

05/04/10 Jeffrey K. McLaren, 51, was issued a summons Saturday on suspicion of misdemeanor theft of chicken wings and a fountain drink from City Market, 200 Rood Ave. (Grand Junction, CO)

05/01/10 Dust remover and ham: Shannon G. Bertram, 35, homeless of Elgin, was charged with a misdemeanor count of retail theft following an incident May 1 at Walmart, police said. Bertram is accused of shoplifting one package of ham slices and three cans of dust remover. His bail was set at $5,000. (Elgin, IL)

04/24/10 A man stole 12 packages of beef jerky, and the rack on which they were displayed, from Rite Aid, 1233 E. Ridge Road, on April 24. (Irondequoit, NY)

05/02/10 The owner of the Hot Dog Man, 1710 Monroe St., said two sodas and 1 1/2 hot dogs were missing. A half-eaten hot dog was left behind. (Vicksburg, MS)

04/30/10 Tuesday evening, David Bryan Johnson, 44, was arrested in the 1700 block of Bluebonnet Drive on suspicion of shoplifting (concealment) earlier at Smith’s Food and Drug, 1775 Lakeside Drive. Johnson allegedly stuffed four packages of beef jerky, valued at $40, down his pants. (Bullhead City, AZ)

04/29/10 Tied-up chicken 3:50 p.m. — A chicken was tied to a tree in the 200 block of North Washington Street. The owner was told to get rid of the creature. (Lodi, CA)