Perhaps the most shocking element of this story is that the website “Fox News Latino” exists.
U.S. Customs Confiscates, Artfully Arranges Nearly 400 Pounds of Bologna
U.S. Customs and Border Protection officers at the Santa Teresa, New Mexico port of entry seized 385 pounds of the Mexican contraband meat from behind the seat of a pickup that stopped at the port on Friday.
09/13/10 Police responded to a residence in the 500 block of Franklin Street at 8:53 p.m. Saturday where a woman claimed that her ex-boyfriend had thrown a bag of frozen meat through her living room window, breaking it, but had left prior to the officers’ arrival. (Salem, OH)
08/11/10 Around 8 a.m. Aug. 11, an officer responded to a report of arson in the 100 block of Manana Boulevard.
A woman said she found what appeared to be a burning box of fried chicken under a coworker’s car, got some water and put it out. She said as she was putting out the fire she noticed a child she had had problems with in the past watching her.
The officer spoke to the child, who admitted he put newspaper in the box and lit it on fire. (Clovis, NM)
Blotter Bonus: Not quite a Meat Crime, but, you know…
08/30/10 A 911-caller rambling about politics, Kentucky Fried Chicken and men with pink eyes expressed an interest in joining the sheriff’s office (Cave Junction, OR)
05/09/10 Dispute: On May 9, a deputy was dispatched to Pioneer Circle, Watkinsville. A dispute occurred between a man and his stepdaughter when he asked her to help move a piece of heavy equipment. She refused because she was reading a book. When he took the book from her, she retaliated by throwing a broom at him. Later in the day, the teenager made three bologna sandwiches, was unhappy with them and threw one. The girl said she was upset because she wanted a boneless chicken meal at KFC. (Watkinsville, GA)
05/05/10 Around 10 a.m. May 5 officers responded to a city building in the 400 block of Seventh Street for a report of a stabbing. A man said he ran to the city building after he got into a fight with his girlfriend over the way he made a ham sandwich. He said she came after him with a frying pan, then stabbed him several times with a pocket knife.
Officers noted the man had wounds to his arm, shoulder, chest and upper back.
Officers located the man’s girlfriend and arrested her.
She said she and her boyfriend got in an argument and he kicked her causing her to fall to the floor. She said she didn’t remember anything after that. (Clovis, NM)
Two Men Nabbed in Fried Chicken Heist
Maybe it’s just me, but when hungry and short of cash, it seems Plan A should be “root around in the couch for loose change,” not “pick up a wooden club and threaten KFC workers for a Variety Bucket.”
12/26/09 Huntsville Police say they received a call around 12:30 p.m. Christmas Day from a Montgomery County man who said several boxes of meat had been stolen from his freezer truck. Police say the man’s vehicle was parked at Motel 6 in Huntsville, when the man noticed his freezer truck had been tampered with. The man said in all ten boxes of meat worth $1500 were stolen. The stolen product included seven boxes of steak, two boxes of seafood, and one unidentified variety box of meat. Police say there are no suspects in custody, but if caught the suspect(s) could face burglary of a vehicle charges. (Huntsville, AL)
12/26/09 An alert grocery store manager in Carlsbad thwarted a big meat heist last week.
An Albertson’s manager said a man attempted to leave the store Dec. 13 with a shopping cart full of choice beef including five 10-pound chubs of meat, two rib-eye roasts, six packages of pork ribs, four sirloin steaks and five packages of chicken breasts.
A police complaint said the total value of the items came to $501.05.
As the female manager attempted to stop the man, he became startled, fled and left the cart and meat behind.
Police reviewed surveillance video from the store and saw a man placing items into a cart.
They later arrested 43-year-old Manuel Cabazuela, described as being a transient.
Cabazuela entered no plea to charges of shoplifting more than $500 but less than $2,500. (Carlsbad, NM)
12/26/09 A man was charged with retail theft after allegedly trying to steal more than $60 worth of meat by putting packages down his pants at an Aurora store, police said.
Anthony Collman, 47, 100 block of North East Avenue, Aurora, was charged with retail theft at 1 p.m. Wednesday at a store on the 1200 block of North Lake Street, Aurora police said.
Police said Collman tried to steal more than $60 worth of meat by putting the packages down his pants.
According to police, Collman was reported to have taken meat from the store on at least two different occasions in November. (Aurora , IL)
12/25/09 DUI, LORAIN ROAD: A man trying to get a late-night hamburger instead spent the night in jail Thursday. The man was trying to place an order at the drive-through at McDonald’s when an employee noticed he was drunk. When police arrived, they noticed the man had a strong odor of alcohol on his breath. He failed field sobriety tests and was arrested. (North Ridgeville, OH)
